2012-11-02 – Friday Whisper – Don’t Oppress, Express!

Sometimes you think that oppressing your feelings is the right thing to do…you don’t express what you are feeling, what you really want, what you don’t want… and you do it because you think you are stronger, you are controlling the situation better, and that is the only right way to do it…

The thing is, you are just delaying expressing your feelings…sometimes it may take weeks, months or even years…

The same way, when we loose a beloved one, we try hard to pretend that we overcame our pain and we are carrying on with our lives… Or when we break up with our boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse, we fall in the “superwoman/superman” syndrome, trying to show up as strong, invincible, sane, whole… whereas we are shattered inside, crying our heart out…

And to avoid feeling the pain, we fool ourselves into thinking that we don’t feel anything… The reality is that we bury our pain deep, burying it alive and pretending that it doesn’t exist anymore… We do all this to try to limit our pain, avoid dealing with what we are facing and shortening our misery period… But it will find its way up again at some point and comes out in a more hurtful and toxic way!

It is not always easy to deal with our feelings, we avoid facing the new situations, circumstances, our new life changed, the new us, because we are afraid of what we might find, afraid to admit that we might have failed somewhere or took the bad decision… we are afraid of our new situation… we are afraid to feel uncomfortable emotions…

Expressing your pain, acknowledging your right to be sad, weak, terrified, angry, accepting the fact that you are not perfect nor right all the time, mourning your heart, crying, living your emotions, all this takes a lot of courage to admit it and do it…

It doesn’t matter what others would say if they see you weak or sad… because “those who matter don’t mind, and those who mind don’t matter!”

Live the period of mourning, go through the process, express yourself, and get a closure… It is only then that you can carry on with your life, easier and in a healthier way… because burying your feelings will only lead to burying your inner truth, your true emotions, your real self…

Johnny Depp, an American actor, said: “You can close your eyes to the things you do not want to see, but you cannot close your heart to the things you do not want to feel.” 

It is weak to pretend that you are strong; it is strong to admit that you are weak…

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Rania Hammoud, Life Coach

www.perfectmind.ca

www.twitter.com/Rania_Hammoud

Check also my blog at http://raniahammoud.blogspot.com 

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